Shameless Request for All Kinds of Help.

Ok, here's the lengthier version of the short list I put in the sidebar:

1) I need 2 persons to volunteer to stuff cellulose insulation into the insulation-blowing machine. The reason I need 2 is that this is about a 3-hour job and one person would get really bored doing this by themselves. This is not the itchy kind of insulation, it is the kind made from recycled newspapers. Go GREEN!!
2) As an adjunct to the insulation request, I think it would be quite handy to have a set of walkie-talkies because I will be up in the attic actually spraying the insulation around and it would be nice to be able to contact the folks on the ground. Does anyone have such a thing I could borrow?
3) I need to pick out a new pair of eyeglass frames and this is something I could use help with. Can someone come with me to LensCrafters sometime and help me make some selections? I want something hip and cool but not ridiculous.
4) Does anyone have a chain saw I can borrow? I want to cut up the big blue spruce so I can burn it up in the firepit. Right now, I just have a 20-foot dead evergreen in my yard.
5) Does anyone have a corded circular saw I can borrow? I need something with more juice than my little 18v cordless model.

I think that's it for now, but I'll surely remember something else right after I click "publish".

Also: private to Bergie: I'm sorry that I've flooded your inbox today. Please forgive me...